The Internet Was Made For Losers (I Need To Get Out)

It is over. At midnight I signed back on to Facebook. I am done. I do not really care.

On Christmas Day, I was enjoying my bike ride up 1st ave. in Manhattan and decided I want to take a year off the internet. Not a year off of Facebook or away from AIM, but a year away from any net connected to another net. No webs. No tubes.

I will plan it out of course, but I am serious about it. This will make some things painfully difficult: airline tickets, getting directions, learning stuff, googling, porn, talking to friends who are too far away to talk to in person, pretending I have a life, making my life seem interesting to people who do not see me, and paying my credit card bills. Stuff like that will be annoying, but so is the rest of the internet. The waste of space and time and energy.

Many think that the internet is something that just exists, but in reality, downloading a movie is a lump of coal. Yes, one lump of coal is equivalent to a gigabyte of memory.

I am not saying the internet is useless and bad, but I am just ready for a break. I have lived online for the last decade and more. I need a break. Not right now, but in the near future. This week without Facebook at first left me thinking I was missing something, but when I sign back on I see there was nothing happening. Now you are reading this and realizing I am not saying anything, so um have a good day?

Twitter Is Connecting Everything!

I have just remembered something I wanted to do during my Twitter Week. I certainly barely scratched the surface of what Twitter is capable of.

Anything can have a twitter account.
Devices are hooked up to household objects so they can send tweets. Some examples:

Baby Linked to Twitter in the Womb
Tweeting Toaster
Twittering Cats. [Humans fake this; stupid humans.]
Plants Twitter

Albert Markovski: Nobody sits like this rock sits. You rock, rock. The rock just sits and is. You show us how to just sit here and that's what we need.

I need a Twitter device connected to my stomach, like the pregnant lady. Except mine will take note when my stomach growls, then send a tweet. Also, when my stomach expands to a certain amount it will tweet again to tell me to stop eating. Without this I will always be hungry or full, but never just right.

Twitter would also be handy with my bikes. I could have a device with GPS twittering so I can see where I went, or if someone steals my bike I can see where they go. While I am at it, I can put on a motion sensor, so my bike can tell me when I am treating it poorly. That will be the day objects can complain that they are getting treated like women, man.

Chip Douglas: The future is now! Soon every American home will integrate their television, phone and computer. You'll be able to visit the Louvre on one channel, or watch female wrestling on another. You can do your shopping at home, or play Mortal Kombat with a friend from Vietnam. There's no end to the possibilities!

Twitter allows everything to connect to everything else.
Once we get everything twittering, then all we have to do is connect all the tweets. Pretty soon, my stomach will tweet to my refrigerator to see what is in it. The refrigerator will tell the stove to preheat itself, while the robot is told to start chopping vegetables. The vegetables will tweet to RADICAL (robots against destructive internal consumption of anything living). RADICAL will announce that another living being has been killed by the human race and that humans must die. Robots kill humans. Robots tweet about death of humans. Twitter rules the world.
[I have been told that you do not need Twitter to set up a system like this, but my question is, if you do not use Twitter how will things be able to comment on what other things are doing? How will vegetables be able to send out a mass "LOL" when the humans get killed? Vegetables certainly are not allowed on Facebook.]

Albert Markovski: The interconnection thing is definitely for real.
Tommy Corn: It is! I didn't think it wasn't! It is!
Albert Markovski: I know, I can't believe it, it's so fantastic!
Tommy Corn: It's amazing!
Albert Markovski: I know.
Tommy Corn: But it's also nothing special.

The nice thing about Twitter is that you do not have to join. If you do join, you can also ignore 100% of the tweets. However, do not be surprised when a robot shows up to your door to kill you. You have been warned.

[I think I am going to go twitter about this blog. Here is My Twitter, if you care to follow. What do you want to twitter?]

Privacy, Nudes, and Being Yourself on the Internet

My Twitter Week has ended. I can return to a normal level of privacy and not have my life broadcast onto the Internet, except I want to say that this level of privacy is a sham:

Privacy
Definition of Privacy:
1 a: the quality or state of being apart from company or observation : seclusion b: freedom from unauthorized intrusion [one's right to privacy]
2 archaic : a place of seclusion
3 a: secrecy b: a private matter : secret

The definition of privacy that I am discussing pertains to secrecy (obviously the Internet is not coming into your bedroom and punching you when you are sleeping).

Many think the Internet is taking away your privacy, but in reality it is giving you the freedom to be yourself in public.

There is a lot of fear that the Internet is documenting your every move. You search for something on Google and it remembers. You post something on Facebook and it remembers. You buy something on Amazon and it remembers. All these sites have information about you. With all this information, these websites may know you better than your friends, but this is not a bad thing (except that your friends do not know you well enough). All these websites know is who you really are.

Being Who you Really Are and the Internet
On the Internet, people do not have to hide their true self. They can be who they want. Even if you are an outcast from a small town, you can find support on the Internet through social networks, blogs, websites, and forums. People use this support to be more confident with themselves and then they add to the community of support for others, creating a ripple effect. However, there are draw backs with the Internet communities. Many forums online have far worse things said on them compared to what gets said face to face off the Internet. This will happen less and less as we lose our anonymity with things like Facebook Connect and Open ID, which let people post as themselves on websites (unless they create fake accounts to hide behind). In general, the Internet is opening up freedom for people to be themselves.

Nudes
Even sex, the unnamed taboo to talk about, has become more open. In a recent study, 20% of teens say they have posted nude (or semi-nude, which most articles about this study accidentally left out) photos or videos on the Internet. This has come as a shock to many, but it is nothing to be concerned about. There is a fear that from these pictures that more kids are getting pregnant and spreading STDs, but this is bogus. When you think about it, these pictures are just people's bodies, their skin. Teens and young adults are flowing with hormones, causing them to have natural sexual urges. Repressing and ignoring their urges is not the answer. Educating and being open about sex will lead to less teen pregnancies and less STDs, not shaming people about their bodies.


Who cares about privacy if it is hindering them from being free? So, enjoy the Internet. Post what you want. Post it as yourself. Do not hide yourself from the world any longer. Unless, you want to post another "spankwire" video, because then you are crazy and you should stay locked in your basement (just kidding, be yourself... if that is what the people in that video are doing).

Well, maybe the Internet is not really helping you be you. Maybe, the only way to be yourself is to not care about being judged and just do what you want. Personally, I just want to live in my speedo. What do you want to do?

No Biking: I Missed the Bus

[art at a bus stop. the L train is bad]

Riding the Bus

Did I mention I rode the bus? I forgot to, but it is worth mentioning. Half the time I looked up subway routes on my iPhone and it would say to take a bus to the subway. I would always skip those directions and look for a route without a bus. However, one time I was only given bus options and I decided to try it out. I actually knew what subways to take and they were the G and L train (two highly hated subway routes).

Anyway, the bus was on time, but I was not. I missed the bus, jumped into the street, and waved to the driver. He pulled over and I got on. I then enjoyed a quick bus ride (about the amount of time it would take me to walk to the subway station). Mass Transit may not be the evil I thought it was.

I HATE ALL MASS TRANSIT INCLUDING THE BUS SYSTEM!

On my trip back home the bus was late. Buses suck as well.

500 Mile Bike Ride Wrap-Up

Pictures from the trip













All is said and done. The miles are totaled. The damage is healed.

Thumbs Up Tour 08 Stats
Miles from SF to LA - 511.5
Fastest Speed - 45 MPH
Showers taken - Four for me including final shower in LA (I believe Caitlin took three... gross)
Bike problems - I had none (Caitlin had two mechanical problems and one seat problem)
Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches I consumed - 17.5 (I did not finish one in San Luis. When we returned from the destroyed tire day, it was waiting on the counter where I left it)
Most expensive gas - $4.849 premium (we didn't buy any there)
U-Turns - Three (but they were only like two miles each and all happened right after another...)
Patches on one tube - Six (tube was never repaired to working condition)

Day 1 SF to Santa Cruz
Miles 89.54
Time Riding 7:34:39
Max Speed 37.5 MPH
Avg Speed 11.8

Day 2 Santa Cruz to Big Sur (I deleted my actual counts)
Miles 86.7

Day 3 Big Sur to San Luis Obispo
Miles 110.28
Time 8:35:27
Max Speed 38 MPH
Avg Speed 12.8 MPH

Day 4 San Luis Obispo to San Luis Obispo
Miles 19.61
Time 1:37:07
Max Speed 30 MPH
Avg Speed 12.1 MPH

Day 5 San Luis Obispo to Santa Barbara
Miles 112.95
Time 8:23:54
Max Speed 45 MPH
Avg Speed 13.4 MPH

Day 6 Santa Barbara to Los Angeles (Venice Beach)
Miles 92.40
Time 6:58:03
Max Speed 37.5 MPH
Avg Speed 13.3 MPH

My Extra Rides
Moraga to SF (I also rode BART)
Miles 9.1

Oakland Airport to Moraga
Miles 23.49
Time 2:10:34
Max Speed 24 MPH
Avg Speed 10.7 MPH

LAX to OAK Airports
Miles ~400
Time ~1 hour
Max Speed ~500 MPH

That is it. Biking 500+ miles was successfully completed.

No Internet Week: Day 7

Sunday, November 25, 2007
Last Day Without Internet...

The week without a computer has come crawling to an end. There have been many times when I wished I could do something real quick on the computer. Download a CD, check out places to go, check prices for things and then save money buying them online (my plane ticket back to California).

The Internet has become a necessity in our world or at least it has become a huge convenience. Fast information, cheap prices, and all while you sit around wearing nothing (I have clothes on while typing this, I cannot promise this at all times). Half the things on my to-do list can be done within minutes on a computer, which could take twice as long in real life (not including time for transportation). Sometimes the Internets* (happy Chin?) just make sense.

I realize I have an addiction to the Internet, but it is weak (ha). I am only addicted while I am using. I get stuck behind the computer. It is not the computer that sucks me in, but the lack of other things to do. I have realized this before and it has been my downfall while living in New York. I wish to play piano and drums. I want to take up skateboarding and surfing. I would like to go swimming everyday or at least a few times a week. I have bikes, books, stuff to write, and a video camera, although if I filmed anything I cannot edit it. I don't have a good excuse as to why I don't write more often. Well, there is a writer strike going on... and I should stop writing in solidarity (I am showing solidarity by striking from work or in being unemployed, whatever you want to call it).

Since taking a week off of the Internet, I decided it would be fun to keep doing weekly challenges. Some can be fun and others can be helpful. Some may push me forward and some will make me regress. That is part of the fun. I was not even sure if I would come out of this week sane, but I did. I think.

OK blah blah blah, in my writing this is where I realized I would do a challenge every week and blogging it... The next challenge will start when this ends.

I shall stop drinking alcohol for a week. This idea has been in my head all week, because the main thing that helped me stay away from the computer at night was getting drunk. I did spend a night or two reading a book, but then I finished it and alcohol took up the slack.

I would like to write more, however I am going to take a break and enjoy the last of my no Internet week by getting drunk with friends. Bring on Alcohol Free Week!

Oh I wish it was a FREE alcohol week...



*THERE ARE RUMORS ON THE INTERNETS! George W. got something right.